if we shadows

on a lighter note

a meme stolen from minnie 

1. Do you like blue cheese? is there anything that blue cheese can't go on?
            yes, immensely. i particularly like it on fruit (strawberries, figs). and yes, i am sure there are combinations that blue cheese should not be part of.

2. Have you ever smoked a cigarette?
        yes, intermittently in high school and college. now i can't stand to even be near smoke.

3. Do you own a gun?
        no, but i am moving to a place where bears (yes, bears) are a problem, even in town so i am seriously considering getting one (and shooting lessons of course will be required as i have never shot a gun before either)

4. What flavor do you add to your drink at Sonic?
        i don't go to sonic

5. Do you get nervous before doctor appointments?
        no

6. What do you think of hot dogs?
        they are not really food BUT i do love me a grays papaya with the works in NYC (about twice a decade)

7. Favorite Christmas Song? 
        i love 'o holy night', and 'have yourself a merry little christmas', and several others

8. What do you prefer to drink in the morning?
        hot tea with honey and milk

9. Can you do push ups?
        not without severe bodily harm

10. Favorite movie?
        i have no idea, it depends on my mood i guess

11. What's your favorite piece of jewelry?
        my wedding band and diamond flower earrings that were my mother's

12. Favorite hobby?
        ummm, knitting, maybe? :)

13. Do you work with people who idolize you?
        i have no idea, that would be weird. respect, i hope, though

14. Do you have ADD?
        no, i am hyperfocused, detailed oriented and plan everything and i am very good at multi-tasking, all of those things to a fault as well.

15. What's one trait that you hate about yourself?
        i have a short fuse and a low tolerance for slow, stupid people. i have to get better about cutting people some slack

16. Middle name?
    my maiden name. i never had a middle name before i got married

17. Three thoughts at this moment:
        how can this kid be hungry again, i just fed her < 1 hr ago?
       annoyance at having to rip back and re-start (again) the purple pull-over for finley
        wondering where my hubby and son made off to, and what they are bringing home for dinner

18. Three things you bought yesterday.
        since i didn't leave the house, i don't think i bought 3 things yesterday, although i have recently bought (online) new baby bottles, a toybox for sam and yarn (duh, of course)

19. Name 3 drinks you drink regularly.
        tea, water, milk

20. Current worry right now?
        my daughter recovering function of her injured arm

21. Current hate right now?
        i don't know, i am trying to be more positive about things

22. Favorite place to be?
        home with my family

23. How did you bring in the New Year?
        i worked in the ER

24. Where would you like to go?
        maine coast for a nice seaside retreat, for about, oh ever

25. Name three people who will complete this.
        ???

26. Who's answer do you want to read the most?
         ???

27. What color shirt are you wearing?
        peach

28. Do you like sleeping on satin sheets? 
        no

29. Can you whistle?  like a bird
        no

30. Favorite color?
        right now, green, but i change alot

31. Would you be a pirate?
       arrhhhh

32. What songs do you sing in the shower?
        i don't sing in the shower

33. Favorite girl's name?
        finley :)

34. Favorite boy's name?
        sam :)

35.What's in your pocket right now?
        a pine cone (a gift from my son) and a tissue

36. Last thing that made you laugh?
        sam

37. Best bed sheets as a child?
        fresh off the clothesline cotton sheets

38. Worst injury you've ever had?
        i broke my ankle several years ago. recovery from this last c-section has been pretty rough, though

39. Do you love where you live?
        not in the least.

40. How many TVs do you have in your house?
        one functional, one not

41. Who is your loudest friend?
        i can't think of anyone particularly loud. several are snarky and opinionated, but not really loud

42. How many dogs do you have?
       two

43. Does someone have a crush on you?
        i doubt it

44. If you could marry a movie actor/actress who would it be?
        they are all nuts, i'm sure, but i wouldn't mind a date or two with orlando bloom

45. What is your favorite book?
        i love books, my house is full of them (and i've owned and read hundreds more) it is impossible for me to choose one favorite.

46. What is your favorite candy?
        dark chocolate

47. Who is your favorite sports team?
        red sox

48. What song do you want played at your funeral?
        i have never thought about it. i like ani difranco's version of 'amazing grace'

49. What were you doing at 12 AM last night?
        likely nursing, finn is still confused on the whole day-night thing

50. What was the first thing you thought of when you woke up this morning?
       i can't believe i slept 2 whole hours without interruption!

that is all

untitled

so my sweet infant daughter has been diagnosed with erb's palsy, a brachial plexus injury that occurred during her delivery, which has caused her left arm to be partially paralyzed. many children do recover partial function so we are hopeful. she will need intensive physical therapy and if she still has significant deficits at 3-4 months, then surgery to try and re-attach or graft onto the damaged nerves.
she is otherwise healthy and alert and gaining weight normally so i know we should still be grateful for her overall health but it is hard not to grieve a little for her injury.
i just hope and pray that she can recover enough function to do what she wants in life.

welcome!

waiting

so after 12 hours of monitoring on wednesday, and hours and hours of early labor, we were sent home to continue to wait; with the change in the weather (a low pressure system) as the cause of my early labor. weird, huh?
but the contractions have lessened in intensity and frequency so i am basically just hanging out at home, waiting for things to rev up again.
otherwise we are scheduled for a c-section on monday afternoon. although i did have one with the first pregnancy, it was unplanned and i was too exhausted physically and emotionally to get too nervous about it. plus at that point it was kind of an emergency to get the kid out. of course this time i have all weekend and most of the day monday to get all nervous and worked up about the surgery. i know i am just being a control freak, but i am finding it hard to relax about this.

i have been knitting, and finished the lace-edged cardigan for the baby. it is my own pattern, top down, raglan sleeve, and essentially seamless. i cast-on and bound off in picot edging which i think looks really cute. i made some i-cords to tie the front together in 2 spots. the lace panel at the bottom is snowdrop lace from traditional knitted lace shawls by martha waterman.
all in all i am pretty happy with the way it turned out, it should fit her this winter.